I’m going wedding dress shopping tomorrow … I’m not getting married.

No: I’m not one of those weirdo’s that does it for fun.


I buy into marriage, not so much the wedding bit, I mean I never took a pillowcase to my head & walked down a fictitious isle made of teddy bears. I’m not sold on the big white dress (you a virgin? & I will happily make this joke time & again in front of her whenever I think I can get a rise out of the crowd), or … well really spending all the money on feeding & watering all & sundry, because you need to invite Bob, your aunties ‘friend’ who you never met before, because otherwise it will upset you mother … & on it goes.

But my Sister is getting married & for her, I want everything she wants to be just so.

My Sister & I are two peas, from two profoundly different pods. We were never friends growing up. She was the cool one with oodles of boyfriends & I was the snitch who told Mum when she was hanging out the window smoking.

She was the popular, pretty one with lots of friends & I was the one who didn’t know how to wear make-up & never got detention (well only that one time & it was joint, so only counts as half).

My favourite childhood memories are of my red BMX & a remote control car I bugged my parents for, for an entire 12 months & I loved that little racing machine for years – it took pride of place on the shelf in my bedroom, when I wasn’t finding new ways to annoy the cat with it.

My favourite memory of my sister, is this one time, we were on a boat in the Norfolk Broads & we were outside with these big red lifesavers around us & our parents went to the inside bit & said to play nice (most likely they did anyway). There were swans & we were leaning over to feed them & my sister fell in.

And I didn’t do anything … well I probably giggled to myself, I have a feeling of that, but I didn’t shout for help … even when the boat started to drift away … god I thought this would be quite a funny story but actually think I was more evil that I recall?! It’s not like anything bad happened – I’m seeing her tomorrow remember … though she has struggled with pneumonia on occasion …

So to bring this back to Yoga (which is the purpose of my amblings), well, the basic definition of the word Yoga is ‘Unite’ … I could then talk about marriage & how that will unite my Sister etc… but what I actually want to say is how it has united my relationship with my sister.

For all the differences that divide us (her unwavering generosity and desire to see the best in people vs my systematic honesty and dogmatic approach to my principles), for the different paths we have taken; I, the self professed geek going as faraway from home as possible to go to University & she at that same age bringing new life into the world. We both, in 2018, embarked on our Yoga Teacher Training.

I introduced her to Yoga (so she tells me) and she just went for it full on, diving into training, even though I started first. I mean I should do my training first? … & it made me think what am I waiting for? How good do I think I need to be, to be good enough to follow something I just want to soak up like a sponge. So what if I don’t actually want to teach, I want to learn, no actually, I LOVE to learn & all I want to learn about is this Crazy old Eastern tradition that all I can get from week to week is a 60 minute class where I move my body. & I LOVE that part of it … I don’t know if you didn’t love the physical practice whether you might come to any other part of Yoga. But I also love the inner peace, the calmness it stills my mind with & all of the beautiful, kind, giving nature of the whole philosophy of Yoga – that is so much more than just the physical. I love how it makes me stop & care about this very moment, stop & enjoy it, know that really, now is all there is & therefore to be present in it, to be here now.

It’s a total 180 juxtaposition from my Corporate Clark Kent day to day (I’m not saying I turn into Superman, I mean if I was going to be a superhero I think I’d go Batman – for the gadgets) but I do bloody feel as good as Superman when I allow myself to get in the zone, so why not bloody go & learn in the deepest way possible.

So here I am, 2 months since my 1st week of intense training + 1 weekend in (7 more to go over the months to come) & how do I feel? Pretty darned happy.

Once I got past the sheer panic on the 1st day, sat in the car, on the verge of tears & took those 1st daunting steps into the room, once I realised my body was going to ache – forever, once I realised the sheer enormity of what I had to learn over my 200 hours alone … I just think, I love this. I can’t get enough.

I practice first thing if I can or at least do some morning nod to it, I listen to a Yoga themed podcast on my way to & from work & now I’m ruddy ‘blogging’ about it … I think this is just some musings from a randomer, but I’m loving this too!

So thanks to my Sister (the one on the left) who for all the reason’s that (& I probably still do you) annoy me, thank you for unknowingly giving me the push to start this next step of my journey. Thank you for all the love & support you give me, advice, books to read … I look forward to where it might take me & us next ❤

Namaste 🙂

PS. Do you remember that time I held you down & punched you, whilst shouting ‘ow stop hurting me’ & Dad came in & found us … ah the memories 😉

One thought on “I’m going wedding dress shopping tomorrow … I’m not getting married.

  1. Well here I am on my jet ski. Not your typical almost 60 year old woman. And Here I am the minister at my son’s wedding. Yoga keeps me perky. Thank you for another letter. I am starting to feel bad. I have worked out on my property all day. I am making concrete and rock tiles for the bottom of my lake and I am rather tired. I love weddings. I got married for the second time about 8 years ago. I will see if I have a picture. I was going to sew my wedding dress and I couldn’t figure the top out so I took it to a lady who had a wedding dress shop. And just as I suspected there was something wrong with the pattern. She had to remake the pattern, and I didn’t have time for her. So I started to look at the dresses she had made. She had her daughter pull one down from a rack above. And it was beautiful. I asked her how much. And she said $380. I had looked at wedding dresses for months and I knew the dress was much more than that and I said. But it’s a $1200 dress. And she said it was a gift to mark down. And I tried it on it fit perfectly. I told her thank you, she just made my day perfect. I didn’t tell her about all the problems that were going on with my husband to be grown up spoiled brat adult child. I was about to call everything off but if it wasn’t for that dress. I hope your sister has the wedding of her dreams, every women deserves that, and I hope the man she is marrying is her prince charming. Looking forward to hearing about your shopping adventure, Deb Sent from Mail for Windows 10


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